Copyright –Kent Bonham
The bouquet instructions had been followed. Arriving with the Chauffeur she couldn’t believe his chosen hotel, she had expected bright-lights-big-city. Shuddering in her killer red dress, she looked up at the dark windows.
“Champagne reception in the main suite.” The doorman bowed. Isabelle found her arm being linked by another man dressed to the nines,
“This way ma’am.”
Be nice if they put some lights on Isabelle thought as she tried to ignore first night butterflies. How perfect Jacques was.
“ Petite disseisor” Jacques grinned and grazed her cheek with a kiss, knowing this night would change her life forever.
(Excuse the formatting copied from file)
awritersfountain 
Oh man! Sounds like the start to a lot of possible and interesting tales. I wish there was more. Nice job with setting. 🙂
Thanks Christopher – I thought that as I wrote it – I am new to Flash fiction and a very wordy talker and writer, they generally take a lot of editing down, This one was no exception, The difference is I saw the possibilities too, I have a few 1000 words waiting to be formed into something, I will get around to writing more around Isabelle and Jacques.
I will let you know when it is posted. 🙂
Thanks! I’ll be looking forward to that. See ya around. 🙂
Am I right to be concerned for her safety here? All seems rather suspicious and creepy to me.
Fantastic Anne! That was EXACTLY what I was aiming for!
Whoahooo!
But don’t worry too much, it hasn’t happened yet (and it is fiction)
Thanks for the response.
I think she may have done something to upset him. Intriguing.
I am glad you are intrigued – that makes me think writing a bit more on this story would be a good idea.
Thanks for reading it.
If I would read this as with my FF glasses on, she’s not going to leave that building …. ever
FF – fan fiction?
There are plenty of ideas swimming around my head. Talk to me more about FF though, because this one lends itself to being opened up at some point I think…. Maybe
As far as leaving the building…. Lips tightly shut in a wry smile…
FF – Friday Fictioneers 😉
I just worked that out and leapt on my phone to edit my reply… Bit too late now. Don’t know the code for an embarrassed smiley face!
That last line leaves everything tantalizingly open. The story sounds lovely but has an underlying creep vibe so it could go almost anywhere.
janet
Thanks Janet that is a perfect response – that is it in a nutshell… mission accomplished 🙂
Wonderful to whittle down and still leave so much!
Thanks for your comment – I worked on this week’s FF offline, usually I just free write and tweak, this one started as a 1000 word introduction. That writing is not lost though as I am thinking of adding further flash bites to this story at some point in the future.
I had fun shaving the words off in an edit without losing the essence – it was re-written 4 times.
enjoyed this piece.. a lot still to be told ! 🙂
Thanks – as I say I am tempted to continue or expand this one in flash size bites – I definitely have prequel ideas and some for what is about to happen!
sounds a bit ominous.
shalom,
Rochelle
Well I don’t want to give the end away…
Living it up at The Hotel California?
Not quite… 🙂
This is very well-written. It also leaves open a lot for the reader to put in themselves.
Thanks David, I wanted to leave it open, there are many possible conclusions to draw.
Intriguing. But I can’t work it out. The French expression isn’t a universal one as far as I can make out. So I’m going to opt for “little heart-stealer”, and she and J will live happily for ever after. Let’s hope so anyway. Otherwise the words garden and path come to mind.
Ahhhhh Patrick I am going to have to reveal too much… I am glad you were intrigued, it was meant to make the reader think, I have cheated on Jacques expression (I was once so fluent in French that in Paris they mistook me for a French girl – I don’t look French at all, alas the language dies within you if you don’t use it!) I was going to get him to speak in French and I love your ‘heart stealer’ it is somewhere near the truth for the idea behind the story/ plot.
The 2nd word, actually means something – it looks French but it isn’t a French expression, just another word to mean something else (talking in riddles because I hope to write prequel/ sequel chunks of this story and reveal it then!) I am impressed though that you have gone in this deep and I thank you for reading.
vampire was what came into my mind. loved the mysteriousness in this story 🙂
Kz you may well be spot on with that all will be revealed in a few more writes I will try to do them over this week.
awesome 🙂 can’t wait
😀 it is a totally new genre to me – both Flash fiction and the content of this tale!
I’d love to know what happens next. I tend to be naive and positive, but reading everyone else’s comments, perhaps the night won’t end well for Isabelle. Very intriguing.
Thanks Sarah Ann, I will write a schedule @ some point this week. It may run into a serialised flash/ short story.
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